Farewell, it's Time to Move on

The tinkle of the first strands of a song reached my ears like a quiet, flowing stream. I closed my eyes, letting the music sink into my soul with ever breath I take.

I walked into the school, head held high. My senior year was about to begin and I could feel all the wonderful opportunities ready to knock on my door. I was excited at the prospects of the new year. I just couldn't wait for what was going to be the best year, the most memorable one.

I opened my eyes and sighed heavily. I plopped down on my bed, relishing the comfort it offered. Using my thumb, I quickly bypassed the one song that brought back bittersweet memories of him and moved on to the next. Violins and percussion ensnared me and brought a grin to my face. The crescent faded as fast as it appeared as the unhappy memories came trailing in.

I woke up from an uneasy night's rest. My body ached. Bricks weighed heavily on my shoulders. I forced myself to make it to campus- only to be told by an arrogant professor that I was in no condition to audition, and no condition to play period and that I should reschedule. After the musical, band concert and contest, as well as orchestra concert and contest, my body was agreeing; it was falling apart and ready to quit.

I turned over on my side and rolled my shoulders. They weren't any better. I rolled my wrists. They were about the same. I groaned and missed the music I use to make. A strong beat filled my headphones and my fingers tapped along happily. It drew me back to the well of memories.

After nights of tears, hours of countless inner battles, a miracle happened and it finally seemed like life was starting to look up. My heart was ready to burst with joy. My mind couldn't contain its excitement. It was a night of many firsts and it had been a night I would never forget...especially since it ended in tears anyway.

I twirled alone in my room, remembering the fun I had and the few disappointments I had those couple of days, the few hours that had been the climax of my year. It was all downhill from there. Worries of college, a betrayal of the highest kind, and disappointments one right after another. I was just trying to stay afloat until I could get out. I barely made it. O.A.R. blared and it hit me al over again.

I was laying in my bed, trying to calm my anger at being treated like a child. I was so sick at the injustices and I just wanted to break out of there. But the word of the night ended up being "down" instead of "out." Tears fell down my cheeks for an hour until I couldn't breathe anymore. "What's the point?" was the question of the night, a question that my being screamed at the deaf world. I just couldn't hold it together anymore.

My mom is calling me down and as I pulled away from my window, I realized that my face is wet. I wipe away the tears and shake my head to clear it. Right before I took out my headphones, I hear

"If today was your last day, tomorrow was too late, could you say goodbye to yesterday?"

The lyrics stopped me in my tracks. I pondered the question for a moment. Then answer resounding in my being seemed to be a yes. I took a deep breath and walked out of the room satisfied. I was ready for the next chapter of my life.